Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize