I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
