he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Text me some of your sweat
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
