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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
