I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
