i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
