When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
