There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
