Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
