what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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