I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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