She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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