she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
