i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
