Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
