im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
