I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I just saw a hot homeless man
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
