Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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