dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
