She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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