Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
