I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Randomize
