either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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