if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
