So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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