I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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