i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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