wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize