I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I need to sanitize my soul.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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