i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Randomize
