Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
