I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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