How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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