But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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