i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Randomize
