do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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