You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
