Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
