He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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