But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
