Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Randomize
