I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
