R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
you guys were way drunker than both of me
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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