Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
this boner is exhausting
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
