apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
