His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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