escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
