She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize