Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
