i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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