Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Quick, to the slutcave!
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
